Powerful Positive Phrases To Respond With Challenging Situations With Children

Updated: Dec 28, 2020

The art of Proactive Teaching

You might be wondering what's proactive teaching about and why it is an essential method of teaching and parenting. Proactive teaching is how a teacher deals positively with a situation. It's an approach where a teacher finds a solution instead of reacting to the situation.

In my first year of teaching, I found it so challenging to handle difficult situation, disruptive behavior and temper tantrums. Even when I became a parent, I noticed that my husband and I had these repetitive responses of "no" and "stop it!" to our child. It was so exhausting to be filled with so much frustration and children can also feel when we are stressed out in handling the scene. There were times I found myself having strong emotional reactions too when my child or student is not making good choices. Do you sometimes feel you want to yell, scream or walk out when you are facing a challenging event with your student or child? You are not alone, probably most of us felt the same way. That's why I'm here to share my best practices.

I learned Proactive teaching strategies from other brilliant educators during my classroom-based teaching career and in graduate school. Over the yeas of practice, these are the phrases that I utilize as my powerful tool to connect positively with my students and children.

I know you've been waiting for the main event, so here are the phrases that you may try:

When your child is playing during the class, you can say...

You can play after the class.

Toys and gadgets are available after school activities.

Focus, please.

When your child is having a challenging time with homework, activities and task, you can say..

I understand your frustration, I'm here for you.

We can do this together.

Let's try to solve it.

Let's find an alternative way to figure it out.

Do you think of a different solution?

Which part do you think you need my help?

Nice try, let's see if the answers are correct.

I love your enthusiasm in learning this, let's try another way to solve it.

When your child needs assistance in courtesy and politeness, you can say..

Let's practice being polite.

Ask your friend politely.

Let's use gentle voices.

Let's use kind words, please.

Please wait for your turn.

No, Thank you.

When your child is upset or frustrated, you can say..

Are you sad? Do you want a Hug?

Let's take ten deep breaths, I will do it with you.

Let's go for a work.

When your child is in a conflict with others you can say..

Personal space, please.

Let's practice making good choices.

Respect others as you want to be respected.

We keep our hands to ourselves.

Please ask permission first before you touch, use or get it.

Have you noticed, I used "Let's" often in those phrases, it's because children feel more driven when they are on a team. I'm telling you until now, I'm still learning and I also ask other teachers and fellow moms about their best practices because I believe that we learn best from each other's experiences. Remember that you can always tweak, modify or come up with your positive phrases. Just sprinkle it with positivity and smile. You can do it!

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